Tubasaluki: Quoting music since 2003

I go through these periods where after being dead tired all day, once the witching hour has arrived my mind springs to life with a rush of thought. Its inspired by something. Maybe the last song played, maybe the words of a book, possibly just inspired by the stillness of night. I don’t know, but my mind decides that, cold and all, I should do something.

This is one of the reasons why I picked up my guitar last night and tuned it only to realize it was 12:30. I’m going to see if I can learn to play…again. I tried this before and did this silly thing called “attempt to graduate”. I did, but came out of the experience less musically inclined.

I think what it comes back to is this desire to create. Create stories, create songs, create food. I want to make something, make something great. Something that people will say “You did that? That’s awesome.” That’s what I want to do.

It might also be nervousness about…I don’t know. I get nervous about a lot of things. My cockiness is usually a front of sorts. I am cautious to a fault, wish risks could be taken out of the equation, and things could be simpler. They can’t though, and so I have to get a rise out of timid self and gamble a bit. I have a feeling there will be ample opportunity to gamble in 2009, but don’t know if I will want the die to leave my hands. Then again, there may not be a rush. Afterall, here, there are no clocks on the walls.

I wanted to deserve a place
A place beside you
This time when I reached out my hands…
It reached all the way to Heaven,

Alan